Dialogue

you're prolly gonna wanna skip this blog post and just read the 'how soon is to soon' the previous one i wrote.

Boy: whaddup wanna get some food?

girl: sure im hungry!

Boy: lets hit up... beto's?

girl: eww like totally over 1000 calories... how about zupas? :)

boy: uhm... sure...

girl: you drive:)

Meanwhile... crappy car drive because boy is thinking about soup and salad.

girl: yum I love tomato basil

Boy: same.

girl: why you so angry?

Boy: im not, soups good.

Girl: you seem upset...

boy: nothings wrong... really.

girl: ok! this sure is good :)

boy: Yup!....(eye roll)

how soon is too soon

When is it ok to get together with someone who just got out of a relationship?
well here are the guidelines.
*DISCLAIMER* every situation needs its own approach and should be treated delicately. these are the absolute bare bones guidelines, and are geared toward the malesss...

Situation 1 (least complicated)

New girl you have just met for the first time and she just got out of a relationship with a guy you don't know. It's go time. You come on carefully. Read it out. if she's not interested back off entirely. if she's mixed signals, go in slowly and don't be pushy. If she's going for you, all bets off no time period just go for it.

Equation: signals + body language = answer

Situation 2 ( more complicated)

you know the girl already but don't know the guy. so this is how it works. you give yourself a rating of 1,2, or 3. a 1 is the best. she is coming on to you and all is looking ok. 2 is she shows interest but still a little hesitation. A 3 is slightly interested, occasional flirting but more of friends. And a 4 you should be reading the friend zoned article.
So after your rating, you plug it into this equation (Her previous relationship length) * (your number)/6= time until its ok to get in a relationship with her.
for example if she was in a relationship for six months, and you gave yourself a rating of 2 the equation would be (6 months)*2/6=1 month.

Equation: (Her previous relationship length) * (your number)/6= time until its ok to get in a relationship with her.

Situation 3 (most complicated)

its your homie's girl. bro code. in this case you probably should not go after her at all. Especially if it is your close friend. I do not recommend persuing her, but if you must here goes.

Get approval from your friend if you still want to be friends. not just an ok ya whatever, make sure its sincere. an approval is a 1. a non approval is 100 and a partial approval is a 2. Then you rate yourself again but this time the lowest is a 2, then it goes 3 and 4. after deciding your rating here's the equation.

|approval of homie|*(previous relationship length) * (rating)/5=time until its ok to get with her

please note these are serious equations that I have spent years researching along with my fellow colleagues at Harvard.

Best of Luck

Lonely Chairs

#LonelyChairs #growingup :(

grand theft auto

all these lines were stolen randomly from random books. 

They lost again. 

my face is hot, my heart pounds

so loud i can feel it vibrating through my bones.

its like we knew it wasnt done.

can i fly away from this mistake? 

suave as hell,

just as flowing water avoids the heights and hastens to the lowlands?

whos the boss? me.

decide to consciously want less

because agency enhances the power of consequence.

if scientists have no theories,

leap forward in terror

because of the 5 elements, none is always predominant, of the 4 seasons, none last forever.

I've never distinguished it in my life,

nothing but blackness and scuffling,

yet here was a mystery. 

thats the lesson you learn

steal like an artist

These are my favorite lines from last weeks blogs congrats if your line is among the few.

I remember bionicles and sonic the hedgehog
I remember Pokemon
I remember seeing my first bad grade and being scared to show my parents
I remember the new year 2000, and wondering what the big deal was
I remember feeling important
I keep the facade simple. Smart, but not a genius. Creative, but not insane. Pretty, but not gorgeous. Alive, but not living.
I fall in love at least once a week
Yeah, it's taking me a lot longer to make it around the sun. But I'm enjoying every step of the way. 
It seemed as though you had already experienced the World, and I was still standing on my front door step.I remember my first kiss and how gross it was
I remember my wet pillow, because there was no shoulder for me to cry on.

Forreals this is all of us?

What happened?

Why is everything about image. We spend sooo much time making ourselves look and feel good, when actually NO ONE cares about anyone else's image. There are two perspectives. I'm better than their image or I wish I was like them, jealous. 

Why do I care about what everyone thinks of me? Because I do. I'm self conscious. I want you to think that I am valuable. When you see me, I want you to think that second perspective. That you wish you were like me, or at least wanted some aspects of me. 

Oh you don't dress up to school? You say I wear sweats and hoodies everyday because i'm too lazy to wake up? i'm too cool? (nothing wrong with hoodies and sweats, they are my favorite clothes) well maybe I wear sweats because i'm scared. I'm scared that when I try to look good, it won't be enough for my image. I'm scared that when you see me you'll think thats it? thats your best? I'm scared of saying I tried my best. I'm scared that you won't like me, or approve. I'm scared of your judgements. They hurt. 

I want to be real. I don't want to be fake, an imposter. I want you to like me for who I am. Is that too much too ask? well it starts with me and you acting ourselves. taking off our masks. being who we are. care less about others thoughts. be selfish. care about you, do you. 

But, it's human nature. we want to be better than others. Our minds make judgements. We categorize, we look for flaws in those 'lesser' than us, and make the ones above us idols. Then we act to fit the norm or whatever you want to be.... guess we will be forever fake 

damn indies.... 

I remember

I remember when the sun went down at ten. I remember when I would cry because I had to go to sleep. Now I pray and beg for five more minutes. I remember racing up stairs, because I had all the energy in the world. I remember thinking I would be the perfect teenager. I remember thinking I would be the best son. I remember imagining what I would look like at 18.

I remember dreaming about playing at Rice-Ecles Stadium

I remember playing at recess. I remember we're a package deal. I remember new captains but same teams every lunch. I remember when I liked school. I remember when kids were nice. I remember being the friendly one. I remember being the favorite. I don't remember when I changed. What happened to me?

Life & Love

Life is fragile.
life is so delicate.
a simple slip in decision making could be the end.
My cousin. i knew had some problems but had no idea how serious it was.
I get a phone call from my aunt and find out she is gone. gone away forever.
simple as that.
dust in the wind.
taking your life doesn't only effect you. it affects everyone who knows you.
especially your family.
is it selfish to? I think so. but maybe... never mind...
through all of this there is a subtle, sad, but beautiful revelation I received.
Life is fragile
Love you ***** *

breaking bad

I am watching a new show on netflix.
its called breaking bad.
its about this middle aged chemistry teacher who has cancer.
he cannot afford to pay for treatment.
so he goes to making crystal meth and selling it.
he then gets more and more into it and making more money.
so ya he becomes a major drug lord and thats about it.
so  thats it.
good show
k bye

duct tape

Duct tape....
what an interesting subject... NOT. a post titled to write about non interesting things.
Duct tape can pick up the dust off my dirty shoes. I can now walk with clean soled shoes only to get them dirty again.
Duct tape can patch a hole in my shirt but it can't put my shattered skull back together... or could it?
Duct tape can hang pictures up on the wall. Snapshots that I have for my friends and family to see to change the demeanor of my room.
Duct tape can fix a leak in a cup. But eventually the liquid will slip through the crevice and the momentary fix will have become worthless. As most apologies.
Duct tape can take the knife out of my back though... I guess.

I'm actually a happy person but it seems dark or depressing writing looks good. We all think so.
yay duct tape...
I'm out

Morphine for the soul

Is it just me? Or does anyone else enjoy the pain. Not the pain from a heart attack or shattered bones. I'm talking about from broken hearts and shattered dreams. The pain that starts from your core and reaches out to your extremities. It hurts. but... it feels... good.

When you break up but don't want it to end. you know there is more, but it just wont work out.
After all your preparation and hard work, you go in confident and you fail.
the disappointments. anguish and sorrow. it hurts. but... I like it. makes me feel. It lets me know I'm real.

The pain when you've given it all you got but you're just not adequate.
When you cry yourself to sleep and wake up exhausted. Go back to sleep...
Leaning against the wall in the shower, pondering, letting water run down your skin trying to warm your frozen heart.

I tell myself to not be depressed but I've become addicted to this pain. It has made me a negative person. I look for the worst and  expect it to happen.

When too many positives happen, am I having withdrawals? I relapse and enjoy the pain.
mmmm... ahhh..... peace

Direct Order to kill

I have been given a direct order to kill my best friend to save ten peoples lives that I have never met before.
My friend... my companion, my buddy...
Whats morally correct? Is it better to murder your mate in the hopes that you save ten random meaningless (to you) lives? or do you not kill your friend knowing that ten people just were assassinated? Is murdering someone in the name of saving ten others ok? or is it better to keep your hands clean but know that ten others died because of your decision?

Comment with what you would do with that direct order.
I would choose to not kill my friend

oh... one of THOSE posts

George makes a million dollars a year, owns his company, works 60 hours a week, and is single.
Fred gets 20,000 a year, works 20 hours a week, has a family, and is an entry level employee
They both want membership into an association that provides services they both desire.
Should George be required to pay the 2,000 a year for both of them?
Well I'm guessing you said no... its obvious right?

Yet in today's society george is required to pay 40% of his income to receive the same level of service, whether desired or undesired while Fred pays 0 dollars a year for the same services if not more. Is that interesting or is it just me?

yes I'm talking about taxes... 

Now I am not saying taxes are a waste and unethical necessarily, but I am just trying to bring up a point of view. 
Any hotheads out there feel free comment. Especially if you said George should pay for Fred's membership!  They'd be much appreciated.

Date with Destiny

Do we actually have control over our lives?

I don't really have an opinion either way. I actually believe I control myself, but I like to contemplate and consider these ideas.

Scientific point of view 

Our parents create us with their genes and DNA. We are born with genes, DNA and a brain that we did not choose, but it defines us. We are raised by two parents in an environment of their choosing. They choose what to feed, expose, and teach. At a young age we learn by example. Blindly following our parents, friends and elders actions. Our personality is not our choice. We have to be the way we are. If you choose to change that is your personality thus you are the same. The voice in our head speaks its mind. But what influences that voice? Is it our genetics? Our environment? experiences? Probably a combination of all three. Do genetics have everything to do with us. Are we biologically programmed to think a certain way? Can every action be traced back to genetics? 

Religious

First off no one get mad. Actually I don't care, call me out. Except for you Nelson. No rude comments from you please. I'm just expressing some thoughts I have had. Doesn't necessarily mean I believe in them. 

Well this one to me is a bit easier to explain. So God knows everything that has happened and that will ever happen correct? Well if he does he knows all of our actions that we will ever make. If he already knows what we're going to do, how do we have a choice? 

Also this kind of goes with the scientific point of view but God created man, and me individually. He made my mind and body. He made me how I am; my personality, strengths, weaknesses, everything! He also put me into a certain family and environment. All of my being was decided without my consent! 

Maybe this makes no sense in words but in my head its a finished crossword puzzle.

Byeee 

Lets complain some more QQ

Regret. That's whats on my mind.

I've got more things to be happy about then I have to be mad about. 

Why am I so unsatisfied? Why can't I focus on my accomplishments and move past 

my shortcomings...

Maybe you have the same problem. I honestly don't care cause no one truly cares about 

anyone else more than themselves. At least I don't believe so. Prove me wrong. Please.

Is it better to focus on why I got that one B+ in music appreciation or an A in calculus? 

Surely the A is much more impressive but yet that B+ looms over me. Almost mocking 

me... go away please. Music Appreciation... MUSIC APPRECIATION! Who cares?

The win over Bingham. Region victory and now on fast track for Region Championship 

and a first place seed in playoffs. But oh wait Timpview, Pre-season game that in the long run 

doesn't mean too much. My dreams taunt me.

                  ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I'm thinking about how I wish I could change. I ache to relive my past but can't. 

I'm thinking about my fears. Why am I so afraid of everyone?

I'm thinking about why it's never good enough. 

Why is mind so furiously trying to get better but my body is complacent with mediocrity?

I'm thinking if I should even write this. Does anyone even read these? I don't need the A necessarily,

but I'm walking to the water so I might as well get the carrot while I'm there right?

I'm thinking about what others think of me. Why am I so self conscious. Does everyone really want 

me to fail?

I'm thinking about success. The word. I'm not sure how to get there but it sure sounds nice.

Double edge swords

What do I fear?

I fear the unknown. That mysterious and dark paths will consume me and that I will never be able to find my way home.
I fear  to disappoint others. That people will lose trust and respect in me and will look down from their ivory tower at me.
I fear to be silenced. That my voice will never be heard and that I will be overlooked simply because I am young.
I fear pride. That it will blind my already blurred vision to the point where I only see myself in a throne and what others do wrong.

I am scared of spiders. When I sleep they crawl through my hair and climb on my ears. Cold tremors shoot through my spine.
I am afraid of mirrors. Not only am I afraid for seeing my reflection and shaking my head in disapproval, but of seeing a hooded figure behind me.
I am terrified of darkness. My mind races when I turn the lights off. What is in that corner? Is something watching me? Is that heavy breathing from outside my window I hear?

The thing I fear most is one in the same. Regardless I will be tormented with this my entire life. I fear Death. I fear that when I die that is the end. It's over. Nothing matters. However I am equally afraid of eternity. Endless. Infinite. Timeless. Nothing matters. Because... I have forever to get it done, or I will die and be forgotten.

Auburn

The band plays.

Drumline pounds deep into your heart, your very soul.

It resonates within you, building the anticipation.

Crowd cheering

Friends watching, judging, do they want me to succeed? 

or to fail.

Family in the midst, Father cheers

as mother silently stands sentry, cautiously watching. always.

Amen. 

prayers are over

preparation has passed

the price has been payed;

blood, sweat, tears, pain, fatigue.

Reflect on the past months. years. 

isn't this what we dreamed about? 

what we've worked for?

We're here. 

gut check. 

All you care about are your teammates, your brothers.

To get that 'W'

Walk out of the armory,

high fives to little kids,

focus....

national anthem

~~~~~~~

refocus....

Opening Kickoff. 

showtime

how bad do you want it? 

are you willing to push harder,

run faster,

exert every ounce of strength 

on EVERY play?

where does inspiration come from?

from deep within? 

what makes you tick?

be passionate, love the game.

do you honestly want it?

if not, get the hell out.

now that only winners are here.

do you want to live,

remembered as a champion?

or die,

forgotten and passed by.

Expert Opinion

what qualifies an expert? who deems someone the title of an expert? What actually is enough knowledge of a particular subject or talent or skill to be an 'expert'? I consider 'experts' to be the best of the best of the best... sir. (Men in Black) ;)

For anyone who does fantasy football, you may feel my pain... Projections by these so called experts are rarely, if ever, even remotely close to actual production. But honestly if you are going to consider yourself an expert, don't embarass yourself trying to babble your mouth spoon feeding your viewers so they will return.

Whatever guy decided that Chris Johnson was most definetly a top 7 runningback this year was horribly mistaken thus far. Less than 20 yards on the ground and the same on receptions? Wasn't he projected by the experts to be in double digits?

Anyways the point is careful what you consider yourself... if you introduce yourself as a jokester, it will be expected for funny jokes throughout the night. Now if you don't introduce yourself as the funny guy, most jokes will be more likely to be laughed at because it is not expected of you to be as funny... Be careful, we live in a judgemental world. I judge everyone I come in contact with, whether its conscioulsy or sub conciously, I make conclusions based on nearly anything. Same with everyone else. And in a country where things are more and more difficult to acquire, you need to distiguish yourself apart from everyone else and come up with a reason as to why you are...

Im not tired just havin a good time...

chirp chirp lovey dovey, quack quack, wheres my rubber duck?

A lover. Don't we all crave one? A partner who is so intimately close, a half of a whole, a dot to my 'i' and the cereal in my bowl.

To some, they only look at the positive aspects of love. Pleasure, a companion, to feel. We may not always be in a relationship for the right reasons or maybe even intentions. Why is it, that things can be going so smoothly then one slip and *SPLASH* we fall under water, lose sight of priorities, vision is distorted, eyes burn as an unfamiliar setting engulfs us. Emerging from the water there are two options stay in the water because its fun, or get out in fear of slipping into the darkness again to avoid pain. I know I have bailed out of the water.. "nuh uh! i aint gonna take nonna dat! i'm bouncin later girl." Sometimes that may be the right choice however. For all you know a shark could be looming ready to pounce and take your rubber ducky under.

Then there are those of us who are afraid to fly. To jump, to take that leap of faith and trust your wings will catch the wind to soar to new heights. Fear of pain. Embarassment. Acceptance and rejection. All are sure to   be present in love. We want to fly, but cant take that first bound. The first free fall. butterflies in your stomach, loss of breath, pounding heart, loss of words.... practice makes perfect? Practice improves? Get over yourselves, jump and glide! You're sure to fail, but would you fall on your face over and over again to be able to fly? You can bet my virginity I would.

avoid those sharks cause they will take your ducklings and trust your wings. strengthen them or you will be a walking bird. Eagle or penguin. Top of the food chain or average life. I like power.

Keep it Real

yes we are selfish...

Selfishness…

Now that I’m thinking about actions… lets speak openly… What do you think about this phrase…. “there is nothing you will do in your life that does not benefit yourself” is it true or false? Initially you may think its true but think about it. Why do you go to school? Because your parents make you? Well you choose to go to school because you think going to school is better for yourself than arguing with your parents or getting in trouble. Oh you the rebellious type and bail on school? Well then you think it is more in your benefit not to go to school than it is and would rather take crappy grades and an argument with the parentals…

Well that was easy… let’s take it up a notch. You’re 27, have a beautiful family. Five year old Jimmy runs out to the street after a grasshopper a car comes flying down the street and is oblivious to your child in the road. You have two options run and push Jimmy out of the way and get hit by the car or watch helplessly as Jimmy gets run over… how could throwing down your life for your children be selfish? Well why would you put your life down for your child? You love him. So why is this selfish? Or in better words to prove my point, how does putting your life down benefit you? Well you may think that the guilt of not doing anything to prevent your child’s is too powerful and would ruin your life forever if you didn’t jump in front. Could you imagine living a life knowing you could have saved your son but sat and watched him die instead? Awful, awful right?

Lets have a discussion in the comment box. Try to think of a truly selfLESS action that benefits someone else and not you at all… and before you say giving money to charity, think about it… why do you give money to charity? Avoidance of guilt, pleasure in helping others, peace of mind, I mean all these things are ways that benefit ourselves… think about it realll hard folks J

Food for thought homies

Humans?

Humans… aren’t we peculiar?

What other animal lives beyond that instinct of survival and reproduction? Why is it that we as a species were able to develop such an innate ability that is uncommonly rare? Humans crave for more, surviving is not enough. We build, develop, create, design, and fathom marvelous ideas that no other creature could comprehend. Humans desire for more, an unstoppable hunger for the best, to be the best is our remarkable trait.

But why? What makes us special?

 Look at yourself… do you plan on being the next Einstein, or the next author of a book such as The Grapes of Wrath ? As in individual it’s hard to gain the motivation to work for a goal. I know I struggle with nearly everything I do. There are few things that can motivate you. I think motivation derives from consequence. Nearly everything we do has positive or negative consequences… and we do things because of those consequences. To become motivated we must look for positive consequences… you must become OBSESSED with that end goal or achievement. Time cannot be bought, rewound, or fast forwarded. To become the best time must be spent or invested into your goal.

Humans… where am I going with this? I have no idea… I just enjoy venting my mind… and I think we could all use some help on motivating ourselves…

Peace

Introduction

It has been years, my young acquaintances. I have returned to inspire, judge, and entertain. My name is Fredrick Turner. If you are interested in living average mediocre lives then don't return to my blog. In fact get in the back seat and let everyone else move ahead. There are others who relish the opportunity to improve and lead a life full of meaning and success. If you are one of those people, return frequently, read posts, and comment! If you I consider you worthy of my recognition then you will receive it!
Here you will be able to learn the secrets of life. However friends, not all answers are freely given. You must ponder and carefully read to gain inspiration. For true inspiration cannot be read, it must form inside you. An idea that is truly yours is priceless. My posts are set up in mazes and riddles. they may seem pointless and uninspiring to the weak of mind, but to you elite, you'll find jewels.