Sunday, January 6, 2013
one word
helmet. headset. eyeball. mouth teeth nose nike twelve read option harry otter elder wand resurrection stone horcruxes snake immortal master of death dreads rg3 cousins family belief unthinkable wonderawe thriy blue green Oregon swag throw snap sack hit fumble game over beard contact phone text girls black sympathy pathetic homework attendance school gay sleep nappy boy nap time big arms browner huge arm center sucks lollipops licks flag mustache Mexican cake lava mountain snow powder sunburnt raccoon animals dog
Monday, December 3, 2012
Dialogue
you're prolly gonna wanna skip this blog post and just read the 'how soon is to soon' the previous one i wrote.
girl: sure im hungry!
Boy: lets hit up... beto's?
girl: eww like totally over 1000 calories... how about zupas? :)
boy: uhm... sure...
girl: you drive:)
Meanwhile... crappy car drive because boy is thinking about soup and salad.
girl: yum I love tomato basil
Boy: same.
girl: why you so angry?
Boy: im not, soups good.
Girl: you seem upset...
boy: nothings wrong... really.
girl: ok! this sure is good :)
boy: Yup!....(eye roll)
how soon is too soon
When is it ok to get together with someone who just got out of a relationship?
well here are the guidelines.
*DISCLAIMER* every situation needs its own approach and should be treated delicately. these are the absolute bare bones guidelines, and are geared toward the malesss...
Situation 1 (least complicated)
New girl you have just met for the first time and she just got out of a relationship with a guy you don't know. It's go time. You come on carefully. Read it out. if she's not interested back off entirely. if she's mixed signals, go in slowly and don't be pushy. If she's going for you, all bets off no time period just go for it.
Equation: signals + body language = answer
Situation 2 ( more complicated)
you know the girl already but don't know the guy. so this is how it works. you give yourself a rating of 1,2, or 3. a 1 is the best. she is coming on to you and all is looking ok. 2 is she shows interest but still a little hesitation. A 3 is slightly interested, occasional flirting but more of friends. And a 4 you should be reading the friend zoned article.
So after your rating, you plug it into this equation (Her previous relationship length) * (your number)/6= time until its ok to get in a relationship with her.
for example if she was in a relationship for six months, and you gave yourself a rating of 2 the equation would be (6 months)*2/6=1 month.
Equation: (Her previous relationship length) * (your number)/6= time until its ok to get in a relationship with her.
Situation 3 (most complicated)
its your homie's girl. bro code. in this case you probably should not go after her at all. Especially if it is your close friend. I do not recommend persuing her, but if you must here goes.
Get approval from your friend if you still want to be friends. not just an ok ya whatever, make sure its sincere. an approval is a 1. a non approval is 100 and a partial approval is a 2. Then you rate yourself again but this time the lowest is a 2, then it goes 3 and 4. after deciding your rating here's the equation.
|approval of homie|*(previous relationship length) * (rating)/5=time until its ok to get with her
please note these are serious equations that I have spent years researching along with my fellow colleagues at Harvard.
Best of Luck
well here are the guidelines.
*DISCLAIMER* every situation needs its own approach and should be treated delicately. these are the absolute bare bones guidelines, and are geared toward the malesss...
Situation 1 (least complicated)
New girl you have just met for the first time and she just got out of a relationship with a guy you don't know. It's go time. You come on carefully. Read it out. if she's not interested back off entirely. if she's mixed signals, go in slowly and don't be pushy. If she's going for you, all bets off no time period just go for it.
Equation: signals + body language = answer
Situation 2 ( more complicated)
you know the girl already but don't know the guy. so this is how it works. you give yourself a rating of 1,2, or 3. a 1 is the best. she is coming on to you and all is looking ok. 2 is she shows interest but still a little hesitation. A 3 is slightly interested, occasional flirting but more of friends. And a 4 you should be reading the friend zoned article.
So after your rating, you plug it into this equation (Her previous relationship length) * (your number)/6= time until its ok to get in a relationship with her.
for example if she was in a relationship for six months, and you gave yourself a rating of 2 the equation would be (6 months)*2/6=1 month.
Equation: (Her previous relationship length) * (your number)/6= time until its ok to get in a relationship with her.
Situation 3 (most complicated)
its your homie's girl. bro code. in this case you probably should not go after her at all. Especially if it is your close friend. I do not recommend persuing her, but if you must here goes.
Get approval from your friend if you still want to be friends. not just an ok ya whatever, make sure its sincere. an approval is a 1. a non approval is 100 and a partial approval is a 2. Then you rate yourself again but this time the lowest is a 2, then it goes 3 and 4. after deciding your rating here's the equation.
|approval of homie|*(previous relationship length) * (rating)/5=time until its ok to get with her
please note these are serious equations that I have spent years researching along with my fellow colleagues at Harvard.
Best of Luck
Sunday, November 18, 2012
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Monday, November 12, 2012
grand theft auto
all these lines were stolen randomly from random books.
They lost again.
my face is hot, my heart pounds
so loud i can feel it vibrating through my bones.
its like we knew it wasnt done.
can i fly away from this mistake?
suave as hell,
just as flowing water avoids the heights and hastens to the lowlands?
whos the boss? me.
decide to consciously want less
because agency enhances the power of consequence.
if scientists have no theories,
leap forward in terror
because of the 5 elements, none is always predominant, of the 4 seasons, none last forever.
I've never distinguished it in my life,
nothing but blackness and scuffling,
yet here was a mystery.
thats the lesson you learn
steal like an artist
These are my favorite lines from last weeks blogs congrats if your line is among the few.
I remember bionicles and sonic the hedgehog
I remember Pokemon
I remember seeing my first bad grade and being scared to show my parents
I remember the new year 2000, and wondering what the big deal was
I remember feeling important
I keep the facade simple. Smart, but not a genius. Creative, but not insane. Pretty, but not gorgeous. Alive, but not living.
I fall in love at least once a week
Yeah, it's taking me a lot longer to make it around the sun. But I'm enjoying every step of the way.
It seemed as though you had already experienced the World, and I was still standing on my front door step.I remember my first kiss and how gross it was
I remember my wet pillow, because there was no shoulder for me to cry on.
I remember bionicles and sonic the hedgehog
I remember Pokemon
I remember seeing my first bad grade and being scared to show my parents
I remember the new year 2000, and wondering what the big deal was
I remember feeling important
I keep the facade simple. Smart, but not a genius. Creative, but not insane. Pretty, but not gorgeous. Alive, but not living.
I fall in love at least once a week
Yeah, it's taking me a lot longer to make it around the sun. But I'm enjoying every step of the way.
It seemed as though you had already experienced the World, and I was still standing on my front door step.I remember my first kiss and how gross it was
I remember my wet pillow, because there was no shoulder for me to cry on.
Sunday, November 4, 2012
Forreals this is all of us?
What happened?
Why is everything about image. We spend sooo much time making ourselves look and feel good, when actually NO ONE cares about anyone else's image. There are two perspectives. I'm better than their image or I wish I was like them, jealous.
Why do I care about what everyone thinks of me? Because I do. I'm self conscious. I want you to think that I am valuable. When you see me, I want you to think that second perspective. That you wish you were like me, or at least wanted some aspects of me.
Oh you don't dress up to school? You say I wear sweats and hoodies everyday because i'm too lazy to wake up? i'm too cool? (nothing wrong with hoodies and sweats, they are my favorite clothes) well maybe I wear sweats because i'm scared. I'm scared that when I try to look good, it won't be enough for my image. I'm scared that when you see me you'll think thats it? thats your best? I'm scared of saying I tried my best. I'm scared that you won't like me, or approve. I'm scared of your judgements. They hurt.
I want to be real. I don't want to be fake, an imposter. I want you to like me for who I am. Is that too much too ask? well it starts with me and you acting ourselves. taking off our masks. being who we are. care less about others thoughts. be selfish. care about you, do you.
But, it's human nature. we want to be better than others. Our minds make judgements. We categorize, we look for flaws in those 'lesser' than us, and make the ones above us idols. Then we act to fit the norm or whatever you want to be.... guess we will be forever fake
damn indies....
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